How Long do 72 Virgins Last?

Apparently the Koran (our spelling) says that under certain circumstances you go to paradise and get 72 dark eyed virgins.

So what is the deal? Do you have to ration them. One a week for a year and a half? What happens when you run out? Or do they stay virgins, regardless of what you do with them?

Seems very complicated. Do you have to buy Ramadan cards for all of them, or only the ones who are still virgins?

Anyway, I'll confess my problem with Islam. They are deeply anti-canine. The only dogs allowed are hunting and guard dogs. I don't trust people who don't like dogs.

MMMMmmmm, but I do dig that falafal.

Me, Myself and I

I hate fifth grade English teachers. All of them. They tell us shit and we believe it for the rest of our lives. Language is complex and flexible.

Lately I've noticed an overusage of the personal pronoun "I" where "me" should be used. Too many people were corrected with a stern "I" and now overcompensate by throwing it in where it doesn't belong.

You end up with incorrect, stilted sentences like "I asked him to give tickets to Allison and I." Or "I'm looking forward to having you stay with Allison and I."

The "rule" is actually very simple, of course. Eliminate Allison (no jokes please) and see how it sounds. "I asked him to give the ticket to I?" WRONG. I'm looking forward to having you stay with I?" WRONG.

I has become a seemingly more sophisticated construction, despite it sounding bad and being technically incorrect.

Me not like.

Throw Away Lines

I watch Law and Order as much as the next guy. OK, maybe more.

It seems to me that the time for "disposable" cell phones that don't require a valid ID to acquire has come and gone. These make it too easy for criminals, and yes, terrorists, to communicate in an untraceable fashion.

If you have to show ID to buy beer or an Uzi, maybe its time to require the same for cell phones. It seems to me that the civil liberties/public safety balancing act is pretty easy here.